Distracted Walking

Nearly everyone has encountered distracted driving, either as a participant or the spectator, or both. It's against the law in Illinois to text and talk on the phone while driving (unless you are using a hands free device). We know it's against the law and yet we still cave in to that urge to "just send one quick text" or "make that one quick phone call". We are consciously breaking the law, right? Guilty as charged. I can honestly say that I have done a "pretty" good job of just keeping my phone put away while I'm driving, however, sometimes sitting at the stoplight seems like a very opportune time to just send that one quick text, or check that last incoming email or missed call (because... you know it just can't wait another 15 minutes). Hmmm...I'm still breaking the law though. I know the law is in place to keep people safe, but I still choose to do it. All sin is considered sin…right? There is no higher or lower level of sin…right? Most of the times we get lucky and don't get caught (I'm one of them). I think it’s fair to say that we usually continue to participate in this “law breaking” mindset until we get caught and have a consequence (a fine, vehicle damage, increased insurance premium, physical injury, job loss). There are some people that have not been so fortunate to escape the serious ramifications of distracted driving and have encountered serious physical, mental and emotional problems, broken bones, scars that will last a lifetime (and fatalities), from the result of being a distracted driver or being the one that is impacted by the other distracted driver. When we take our eyes off of the road for even just a few seconds to make a quick text, read a quick text, or dial that number, we are putting ourselves, and others around us in danger, which is obviously why the law is in place…right? Let’s be honest with ourselves, the majority of us know we are deliberately breaking the law (for some people.. they justify it by just saying they are just bending the rules a little bit). We know full well that those “quick” distractions can result in consequences that leave us, and those we care about, in a frenzy of emotions, feelings and uncomfortable situations. The impact is felt all around us. It’s devastating. It hurts. We regret our stupid, selfish choices. We know this, but we still do it. OUCH! The title of this blog wasn’t a typo. Distracted walking. What in the world does distracted walking have to do with distracted driving? Distracted walking. Your walk with Christ. Your spiritual life. Your personal relationship with Christ. Taking your eyes off of Christ. Are you with me now? Now, think about all of the distractions you have encountered on your spiritual journey, and likely encountered already today. Take a few minutes right now and think about all of the distractions in your spiritual life, in your prayer life, in your promises to your Savior. Pray and ask God to reveal how you are distracted in your own spiritual journey. Those same distractions, whatever they are, cause us to take our eyes off of our Savior. Just like with distracted driving, we take our eyes off of Christ and our vision is blurred. We think we are invincible and we’ll be okay. We think we can continue down the road and keep making the conscious choice to be distracted. Wrong. It will catch up with you. You can have your eyes so focused on the distractions around you that you don’t even realize what road you are on or quite possibly that you don’t have your eyes on Christ at all. The consequences are similar to distracted driving. Loss. Hurt. Pain (emotional, physical, mental, spiritual). Brokenness. Regret. Turmoil. Lack of trust. Jealousy. Loss. Severed friendships. Strained friendships. The impact is felt on those around us, even if they don’t know what’s going on. We can’t change the past. WHY? WHY? WHY would we possibly want this mess for our lives? For the lives of those we love? WHY? It’s not worth it. I often wonder what’s worse, the heartache of self- blame for the pain we inflict on people we care about, or the deep, scarring pain of the brokenness from taking my eyes off of Christ. We often don’t even realize how far off the road we have become (hindsight is always 20/20 eh). How did I get here? What caused me to steer so far from my God who absolutely adores me, a God who has greater plans for me than I can even imagine, Yahweh, my Abba Father in heaven. I would never intentionally choose wandering in the dark, dry desert , over walking in a thirst quenched, thriving, victorious life with Christ. Who would do such a thing? I would. I did. I do. You would. You do. I am a sinner. You are a sinner. I made the conscious choice to be distracted and unfortunately, I also became the distracter. Double ouch. The impact was devastating. The losses piled up, almost to the point of me making a REALLY stupid and selfish decision. I’m eternally thankful for the person that loved me, unconditionally and without judgment (as Christ followers should do) at this lowest, darkest point in my life and my spiritual journey. One of the greatest losses was losing trust and friendship from someone that I had great respect and love for (yeah.. don’t judge.. I know what you are thinking. If you loved and respected them so much, how could you hurt them? I asked myself this a gazillion times. There are only a few words that I can come up with to explain this… BLINDNESS and SELFISHNESS). SIN. My consequences didn’t include a monetary fine, a get out of jail free card, or increased premiums. My consequences were felt at the core of my soul. Regret. Shame. Anger. The list goes on. It is felt deep. The results of distracted driving and distracted walking are very similar, however, are very different in nature. I, in no way, want to minimize the traumatic results of distracted driving, I’m simply comparing the dangerous, lasting effects they both have on us, and those around us. Along this life altering journey, I have had to make the decision between accepting God’s Word as truth and holding on to His promises, or throwing in the towel and walking away from Christ altogether. I listed the pros and cons. Life is hard with Christ, but there’s hope when we are hopeless. Life is hardER without Christ, when we have no hope in anything but this fallen, miserable world. As I sought God’s Word for answers, guidance, forgiveness and hope, He renewed my heart and even though I still battle with the destruction, I am reminded that I am forgiven by my Savior. I have not been forgiven by the people I have wronged and I pray that I would not be a stumbling block to them anymore. Throughout this part of my journey I kept asking God, with clenched fists and a tear stained face, how is it even possible to make this work for Your good, Lord? I still ask. The only good that has come from this wretched path is that it has brought me to my knees and has caused me to draw closer to God at a time of great loss. I choose to praise God for that, even though I hate and regret that it happened. I have a different view of life now. I have a different view of the church now. I have a different view of friendships now. I have a different view of who I am now. I have a different view of how I think people view me now. I have a different view of what it means to be forgiven now. I have a different view of what forgiving others is now. I have a different view of what grace is now. I have a different view of mercy now. I have a different view of who I am in Christ now. I have a different view on what it means to let go now. I have a different view of other people now. The result of taking my eyes off Christ has been complete brokenness, shame, regret, sorrow and deep pain. I’m a giver, not a taker, usually. I was a taker. I hate that. That isn’t who I am. But I did it. A forever scar on my heart (the only tattoo I have). I know how God sees me. I don’t see myself the same way He does. I’m thankful. Undeserving. Humbled. Forgiven. Some days it’s more than I can take to accept these words. We are sinners by nature. We lie, cheat, steal. We manipulate. We sin. We repent. God restores. Life is a journey. I don’t want to be a distracted Christ follower. I don’t want my family to have to feel the impact of my distracted walking any more than they already have. It hurts. I’m wounded. I’m weak. I’m moving on. I’m not going to stay stuck any longer. I can’t. I can do this in Christ. I’m free. I will grow. I will fail. I will become weak again. I will condemn myself. He will carry me. His arms are opened wide to receive me. He has a plan for me. He sees me as blameless. He loves me. That’s enough. Perspective is everything. Life is hard. Forgive. Distracted walking is disastrous. Keep your eyes on Christ. Don’t text or talk and drive. It can wait.